Had a chance to re-watch Frozen recently together with my nephew and niece. Little things I know, I’ve rethink the lesson learnt I’ve gathered before. Previously, I just watched the film as a leisure only and think it’s about the power of love and sacrifices but now I’ve discovered another lesson ie. living in silo. It’s about what I’ve experienced right now.
Yes, isolation.
Elsa’s life is my life and Anna is the representation of other people in my social circle. At first I thought Frozen is just about the power struggle between Elsa and others. But the longer I re-examine the storyline the more I understand the struggle that Elsa faced. She needs to keep her secret with an intention to protect others but ended up pushing people away from her life. Maybe that’s what am doing right now. Being comfortable to live in silo and manage all of my life challenges all by myself. Even everyday my life getting messy and messier.
What are the lesson learnt I’ve gathered so far? Googled to find out if others shared similar experience or not. As summarised by Lifehack, almost similar with what I’ve thinking so far.
- Exercise self control – yes, I’m so good in shutting people out and suppressing emotions (sometimes) but when it’s too much to handle, it will affect my decision making process. Maybe, despite being overwhelmed by emotions, it helps when you make sense of a situation before making a move. This way, you have complete rein of your feelings because you know what triggers them and therefore make rationale decisions based not just on emotions alone but also logics.
- Communicate – truthfully, everything can be avoided if only I opened up to people. I still not make peace with my decision to reach out to people, but I need to admit why somehow I managed to survive is because I listened to friend’s advise ie. not bottle up my emotions. I thought by keeping people in the dark about my isgues is doing everybody a favor but the in reality my stubborness will bring more harms than good. The point is this : it’s perfectly fine if you want to spend time wallowing in your sadness but it wouldn’t hurt if you get help from people who are actually willing to give it to you – even if it’s just someone who will listen to you rant.
- Channel your emotions in a constructive manner – never let your emotions take control of your life because whenever you try to resolve issues by following your emotions alone normally it will end up damaging the situation even worse.
- Relationships take a lot of work – I have the tendency to push people away whenever things getting harder or I start to feel uncomfortable to share my issues with others. However being in relationships regardless as friend or lover, is always a mixture of storms and rainbows, of moments where you think and move in synchrony and ugly fights. Only those who are willing to work through these together can truly enjoy the purpose of having a companion or partner. One thing for sure, I can’t force people to view me as their best friend. Just because l view them as my best friend, doesn’t mean automatically I am their best friend. Should learn to strike a balance.
On Becoming An I(M)perfectionist 